Relationships and the associated conflict of relationships can have behavioral reactions that have nothing to do with the person with whom we have strife.  Many of us learned trauma coping skills at a very early age.  If attachment patterns form during 0-3 years and our world view forms during 0-12 years, then much of how we interpret our world occurs before we have adult relationships. HOWEVER, we can heal our brain patterns as we discover the truth and start thinking about our formative memories differently.  Cait Beiler and Sharon Wegman discuss common trauma coping responses that people have in relationships based on their past in this episode.  You don’t have to keep repeating cycles in your relationships if you choose to do the work of understanding your personal story.